16 Phrases That Make Your Cringe

[uk666]

16 Phrases That Make Your Cringe

1. Square the circle ~ Is this supposed to make you sound clever? Because all it does is make you think that you're just about to ruin a perfectly good circle.
2. Don't let the grass grow too long on this one ~ work fast. I'm looking for a polite way of suggesting that you get off your backside and get on with it.
3. Not enough bandwidth ~ Too busy. Really? Try upgrading to fibre optics. We know a few people who haven't been blessed with enough "bandwidth" and it's got nothing to do with being busy.
4. Don’t reinvent the wheel ~ Don’t try to be innovative, just keep things simple. Advice does not get much vaguer. 
5. Get down in the weeds ~ This means to go into detail, to discuss the complexities of the issues. It’s quite a tricky one to understand how it originated ~ garden weeds are not the most complex plant.
6. Put a record on and see who dances ~ Unfortunately, the kind of person who says this is likely to put on Gangnam Style because they think that's cool too.
7. I hear what you are saying ~ Everyone cringes when they hear this because the literal translation is: I’m going to carry on with my point and ignore yours.
8. Keeping this show on the road ~ This means to keep something going successfully, which isn’t too cringey until someone abbreviates it to KSOR in an email and you stare at it for five minutes to figure out what that actually means. The pessimists’ alternative is keeping the boat afloat.
9. Let’s touch base offline ~ The jazzier way of saying let’s meet in person, which you may want to think carefully about if you hear someone use this phrase.
10. Push and pull strategy ~ A push strategy is when you push a product towards a customer and a pull strategy is when you pull a customer towards a product. It’s a phrase that’s too often directed at us non-marketing muggles.
11. Sharpen the point of this pencil ~ Well done for not gagging when you read this one. It means to go further into detail about what you’re saying to leave a more refined mark on the listener ~ although it could be interpreted differently.
12. Sing from the same hymn-sheet ~ This is another way of saying let’s all work in unison, unless your church is running out of lyric-sheets for its hymns.
13. This is mission critical ~ If something is mission critical it is very important to the success of the venture. We imagine sci-fi fans like to say this in a dramatic voice.
14. From the cradle to the grave ~ This means from start to finish, which is much better to say, unless you are feeling particularly morbid.
15. Get all your ducks in a row ~ Be organised. Bert and Ernie from Sesame Street were obsessed with rubber ducks. You may think I'm disorganised, but there's no need to talk to me like a five-year-old.
16. Low hanging fruit ~ Easy win business. This would be perfect for hungry children in orchards, but what is really happening is an admission that you don't want to take the complicated route.