The Real Questions In Life....

[uk666]

The Real Questions In Life....

1. Why are they called buildings if they’re already built?
2. Why does the Easter bunny carry eggs? Rabbits don’t lay eggs.
3. If Cinderella’s shoe fit her perfectly, then why did it fall off?
4. Why do people say that they ‘slept like a baby’ if they slept through the night when babies are known for not sleeping?
5. Can blind people dream?
6. Since bread is square, then why is sandwich meat round?
7. Is there a time limit on fortune cookie predictions?
8. What was the first man to milk a cow trying to do?
9. If parents say, “Never take candy from strangers” then why do we celebrate Halloween?
10. If a jogger runs at the speed of sound, can he still hear his iPod?
11. Why do noses run but feet smell?
12. How did a fool and his money GET together?
13. If revenge is a dish that’s best served cold, and revenge is sweet, then is revenge ice cream?
14. When does it stop being partly cloudy and start being partly sunny?
15. Why do we cook bacon and bake cookies?
16. If a word is misspelled in the dictionary, will we ever know it?
17. Why is it that when we "skate on thin ice", we can "get in hot water"?
18. If money doesn't grow on trees then why do banks have branches?
19. If a doctor suddenly had a heart attack while doing surgery, would the other doctors work on the doctor or the patient?
20. If pro and con are opposites, wouldn't the opposite of progress be congress?
21. Why do they sterilise the needles for lethal injections?
22. If you expect the unexpected, doesn’t that make the unexpected expected?
23. If the early bird gets the worm, why do good things come to those who wait?
24. What is a picture of a thousand words worth?
25. Why does quicksand work slowly?
26. If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
27. What’s a question with no answer called?
28. If God sneezes, what should you say?
29. Can a short person “talk down” to a taller person?
30. If you had fun while you were wasting time, can you still say that you wasted time?
31. If a kid refuses to sleep during nap time, are they guilty of resisting a rest?
32. Can you daydream at night?
33. If you describe something as indescribable, haven’t you already described it?
34. What happens to an irresistible force when it hits an immovable object?
35. How do you know when it's time to tune your bagpipes?
36. Isn’t the word ‘queue’ just the letter Q followed by four silent letters?
37. If man evolved from monkeys, how come we still have monkeys?
38. If you punch yourself and it hurts, are you wear or are you strong?
39. Why do they call the little candy bars "fun sizes”? Wouldn't it be more fun to eat a big one?
40. If the sky is the limit, then what is space, over the limit?
41. How can something be “new” and “improved”? if it’s new, what was it improving on?
42. If we need to follow rules at all costs, then why do we make exceptions to these rules?
43. Why is the Lone Ranger called ‘Lone’ if he always has his Indian friend Tonto with him?
44. How do you grow a seedless fruit?
45. Why do they call it a TV set when you only get one?
46. If a vampire bites a zombie, does the zombie become a vampire or does the vampire become a zombie?
47. How do you handcuff a one-armed man?
48. When all is said and done, would you have said more than you have done?
49. Why call it "take" a dump, when you leave something behind?
50. What was the best thing before sliced bread?

[bluescope]

46. If a vampire bites a zombie, does the zombie become a vampire or does the vampire become a zombie?

Maybe it would be vombie and zampire?

In any case, Milla Jovovich would never be able to exterminate a vombie in Resident Evil! Horrible thought.

 

49. Why call it "take" a dump, when you leave something behind?

besides the subtle double entendre about 'leaving ... behind', it reminds me of the old joke about the short butcher backing into the bonesaw and getting a little behind with his work.

[Bad Karma]

7 hours ago, uk666 said:

What’s a question with no answer called?

I have the answer for this : a forum topic "answer the question...."