My Job Searches

[uk666]

My Job Searches

1. My first job was working in an Orange Juice factory, but I got canned. Couldn't concentrate.
2. Then I worked in the woods as a Lumberjack, but just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the axe.
3. I tried to retire from tracking as I could not follow the treads.
4. After that, I tried being a Tailor, but wasn't suited for it, mainly because it was a sew-sew job.
5. Next, I tried working in a Muffler Factory, but that was too exhausting.
6. I worked in an abattoir until I was boned.
7. Then, tried being a Chef - figured it would add a little spice to my life, but just didn't have the thyme.
8. I worked on a newspaper until it was not new anymore.
9. Next, I attempted being a Deli Worker, but any way I sliced it.... I couldn't cut the mustard.
10. My best job was a Musician, but eventually found I wasn't noteworthy.
11. I studied a long time to become a Doctor, but didn't have any patience.
12. Next, was a job in a Shoe Factory. Tried hard but just didn't fit in.
13. Then, I became a Professional Fisherman, but discovered I couldn't live on my net income.
14. I was a waste disposal worker until I was recycled into management.
15. Managed to get a good job working for a Pool Maintenance Company, but the work was just too draining.
16. I was a registered shooter for culling herds until my job was targeted.
17. Then, I was a cleaner in a company making robotic vacuum cleaners until I was found surplus to requirements.
18. Next, I was an airline pilot until the company bailed out.
19. I worked in a fish and chip store until seagulls negotiated a right of entry.
20. So, then I got a job in a Workout Centre, but they said I wasn't fit for the job.
21. After many years of trying to find steady work, I finally got a job as a Historian - until I realised there was no future in it.
22. My last job was working in Starbucks, but had to quit because it was the same old grind.

SO, I TRIED RETIREMENT AND I FOUND I'M PERFECT FOR THE JOB!