Andr-Tech uk666 Posted August 11, 2018 Andr-Tech Share #1 Posted August 11, 2018 Drinking Troubleshooting Guide Symptom: Drinking fails to give satisfaction and taste; shirt front is wet. Fault: Mouth not open when drinking or glass being applied to wrong part of face. Solution: Buy another pint and practice in front of a mirror. Continue with as many pints as necessary until drinking technique is perfect. Symptom: Drinking fails to give satisfaction and taste; beer unusually pale and clear. Fault: Glass is empty. Solution: Find someone who will buy you another pint. Symptom: Feet cold and wet. Fault: Glass being held at incorrect angle. Solution: Turn glass so that open end is pointing at ceiling. Symptom: Feet warm and wet. Fault: Loss of self-control. Solution: Go and stand beside nearest dog - After a while complain to its owner about its lack of house training. Symptom: Bar blurred. Fault: You are looking through the bottom of your empty glass. Solution: Find someone who will buy you another pint. Symptom: Bar swaying. Fault: Air turbulence unusually high - maybe due to darts match in progress. Solution: Insert broom handle down back of jacket. Symptom: Bar moving. Fault: You are being carried out. Solution: Find out if you are being taken to another bar - if not complain loudly that you are being hi-jacked. Symptom: The opposite wall is covered in ceiling tiles and has a fluorescent strip across it. Fault: You have fallen over backwards. Solution: If glass is still full, and no one is standing on your drinking arm, stay put. If not, get someone to lift you up and lash you to the bar 2 Link to comment
mgk1956 Posted August 12, 2018 Share #2 Posted August 12, 2018 I have to thank you in spite of the warnings regarding "pushing the thank you button". The reason is I have experienced 1,23,5 and 6. So far I haven't experienced 4.and the rest. I am eternally grateful Uk666. You have opened my eyes. I salute you for this useful post as I feel many would. Thanks once again. But I feel this post really deserves a verbose reply! 1 1 Link to comment
Recommended Posts
Please sign in to comment
You will be able to leave a comment after signing in
Sign In Now