Funny Christmas Quotes from Famous Personalities

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Funny Christmas Quotes from Famous Personalities

Famous figures bring holiday cheer with witty quotes that add a humorous twist to Christmas.

1. That’s the true spirit of Christmas; people being helped by people other than me. ~ Jerry Seinfeld
2. Christmas is a time when kids tell Santa what they want, and adults pay for it. ~ Richard Lamm
3. Nothing’s as means as giving a little child something useful for Christmas. ~ Kin Hubbard
4. Aren’t we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas? You know, the birth of Santa? ~ Matt Groening
5. Keep your friends close, your enemies closer, and receipts for all major purchases. ~ Unknown
6. Bloody Christmas, here again, let us raise a loving cup, peace on earth, goodwill to men, and make them do the washing up. ~ Wendy Cope
7. It was two weeks before Christmas. A slow time of year for raising the dead. ~ Laurell K. Hamilton
8. I hate, loathe and despise Christmas. It’s a time when single people have to take cover or get out of town. ~ Kristin Hunter
9. If ifs and buts were candy and nuts, it would be Christmas every day. ~ John Boehner
10. Aren’t we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas. You know, the birth of Santa. ~ Matt Groening
11. The ultimate in longevity is the Christmas fruitcake. It is a cake made during the holidays with fruits that make it heavier than the stove it is cooked in. ~ Erma Bombeck
12. I’ve learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way he handles these three things:

• a rainy day
• lost luggage
• tangled Christmas tree lights. ~ Maya Angelou