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English Doctor


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An eminent English doctor is visiting an Edinburgh hospital. He enters a ward full of patients with no obvious sign of injury or illness.
He asks the first patient how he feels. The patient replies:
Fair fa your honest sonsie face, Great chieftain o the puddin race,
Aboon them a ye take yer place, Painch, tripe or thairm, As langs my
airm.
The Englishman is confused, so he just smiles and moves on to the next patient.
The patient responds:
Some hae meat an canna eat, And some wad eat that want it, But we hae meat an we can eat, So let the Lord be thankit.”
Even more confused, the eminent doctor moves on to the next patient, who immediately begins to chant:
Wee sleekit, cowerin, timrous beasty, O the panic in thy breasty,
Thou needna start awa sae hastie, Wi bickering brattle
.”
Now seriously troubled, the eminent doctor turns to the guide and
asks, “Is this a psychiatric ward?
Nay,” replies the doctor, “This is the serious Burns unit.”
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