Spoon

[uk666]

Spoon

Last week I took some friends out to a restaurant and noticed that the waiter who took our orders carried a spoon in his shirt pocket. It seemed a little strange but I ignored it. However, when the busboy brought out water and utensils, I noticed he also had a spoon in his shirt pocket.

I then looked around the room and saw that all the waitpersons had a spoon in their pocket. 

When the waiter came back to check on our orders I asked: "Why the spoon?"

"Well," he explained, "the restaurant owner hired Andersen Consulting experts in efficiency, in order to revamp all our processes. After several months of statistical analysis, they concluded that customers drop their spoons 73.84% more often than any other utensils. This represents a drop frequency of approximately 3 spoons per table per hour. If our personnel are prepared to deal with that contingency, we can reduce the number of trips back to kitchen and save 1.5 manhours per shift."

As we finished talking, a metallic sound was heard from behind me. Quickly the waiter replaced the dropped spoon with the one in his pocket and said: "I'll get another spoon next time I go to the kitchen instead of making an extra trip to get it right now."

I was rather impressed; the waiter continued taking our orders and while my guests ordered I continued to look around. I then noticed that there was a very thin string hanging out of the waiter's fly. Looking around, I noticed that all the waiters had the same string hanging from their flyes.

My curiosity got the better of me and before he walked off, I asked the waiter: "Excuse me, but can you tell me why you have the string right there?" 

"Oh, certainly!" he answered, lowering his voice. "Not everyone is as observant as you are. That consulting firm I mentioned, also found out that we can save time in restroom."

"How so?"

"See," he continued, "by tying this string to the tip off ... you know ... we can pull it out over the urinal without touching it and that way eliminate the need to wash the hands, shortening the time spent in the restroom by 76.39%."

"Okay, that makes sense, but ... if the string helps you get it out, how do you put it back in?"

"Well," he whispered, lowering his voice even further:

"I don't know about the others, but I use the spoon."