Seafood Posted March 9 Share #926 Posted March 9 The only reason why I'm good at keeping secrets is because I forget them. 1 Link to comment
Seafood Posted March 10 Share #927 Posted March 10 If anyone would like to help out with the restoration of our local Church... Give us a bell 1 Link to comment
Seafood Posted March 11 Share #928 Posted March 11 In California, they don't throw their garbage away - they turn it into TV shows Link to comment
Seafood Posted March 12 Share #929 Posted March 12 The problem with retirement is.... You never get a day off. Link to comment
Seafood Posted March 13 Share #930 Posted March 13 I got a job as an Astronaut, But they said i was a waste of space, Link to comment
Seafood Posted March 14 Share #931 Posted March 14 To any Spanish speaking friends on here. Hasta anie bisto Ive run out of gravy, Link to comment
Seafood Posted March 15 Share #932 Posted March 15 I crossed a Crocodile with a Budgie It bit my leg off and said,,,Who,s a naughty boy,, Link to comment
Seafood Posted March 16 Share #933 Posted March 16 Retirement has cured many a businessman's ulcer - and given his wife one. Link to comment
Seafood Posted March 17 Share #934 Posted March 17 I said to the doctor my wife smokes before during and after sex? He said That's Ok I said But it’s the same cigarette! Link to comment
Seafood Posted March 22 Share #935 Posted March 22 Well i just had some good news after all the bad new news, the Police want to interview me, and i have not even applied for a job Link to comment
Seafood Posted March 23 Share #936 Posted March 23 Retirement happens when you overachieve in the area of experience. Link to comment
Seafood Posted March 24 Share #937 Posted March 24 It is nice to get out of the rat race, but you have to learn to get along with less cheese. 1 Link to comment
Seafood Posted March 25 Share #938 Posted March 25 I don't feel old. I don't feel anything until noon. Then it is time for my nap. Link to comment
Seafood Posted March 26 Share #939 Posted March 26 A father said his teenage son took an aptitude test and was found to be well-suited for retirement. Link to comment
Seafood Posted March 27 Share #940 Posted March 27 I finally managed to teach my dog to beg. Last night he came home with fifty pounds. 1 Link to comment
Seafood Posted March 29 Share #941 Posted March 29 The Bishop came to our church today, but I think he was an imposter. He never once moved diagonally. Link to comment
koolkat Posted March 30 Author Share #942 Posted March 30 Confucius say: He who laugh last, slow to get joke. 1 Link to comment
koolkat Posted March 30 Author Share #943 Posted March 30 Confucius say: He who throw dirt, lose ground. 1 Link to comment
koolkat Posted March 30 Author Share #944 Posted March 30 Confucius say: Hard work pay off in future. Laziness pay off now. 1 Link to comment
koolkat Posted March 30 Author Share #945 Posted March 30 Confucius say: Student who study history will find there is no future in it. 1 Link to comment
koolkat Posted March 30 Author Share #946 Posted March 30 Confucius say: Banker who sit in freezer have frozen assets. 1 Link to comment
koolkat Posted March 31 Author Share #947 Posted March 31 Thieves were caught hours after stealing GPS tracking devices from tech company 1 Link to comment
Seafood Posted March 31 Share #948 Posted March 31 My long lost uncle has left me his stately home Does anyone know where Sod Hall is? Link to comment
Seafood Posted April 1 Share #949 Posted April 1 I distrust camels, and anyone else who can go a week without a drink Link to comment
Seafood Posted April 3 Share #950 Posted April 3 I don't know if laughter is the "best" medicine, but I do like that it doesn't have a $35 co-pay. Link to comment
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