22 Fresh Halloween jokes for 2020

[Bad Karma]

Q: Why do ghosts go on diets?
A: So they can keep their ghoulish figures

Q: What does a panda ghost eat?
A: Bam-BOO!

Q: Why don’t mummies take time off?
A: They’re afraid to unwind.

Q: Why did the zombie skip school?
A: He felt rotten.

Q: What is a vampire’s favorite fruit?
A: A blood orange.

Q: Where do baby ghosts go during the day?
A: Dayscare centers!

Q: Why did the headless horseman go into business?
A: He wanted to get ahead in life.

Q: What kind of music do mummies like listening to on Halloween?
A: Wrap music.

Q: Why don’t mummies have friends?
A: Because they’re too wrapped up in themselves.

Q: Why did the vampire read the newspaper?
A: He heard it had great circulation.

Q: What’s it like to be kissed by a vampire?
A: It’s a pain in the neck.

Q: What’s it called when a vampire has trouble with his house?
A: A grave problem.

Q: What do you call a cleaning skeleton?
A: The grim sweeper.

Q: Why did the vampire need mouthwash?
A: Because he had bat breath.

Q: What do you call a witch’s garage?
A: A broom closet.

Q: What kind of food would you find on a haunted beach?
A: A sand-witch!

Q: What's a witch's favorite makeup?
A: Ma-scare-a.

Q: Who helps the little pumpkins cross the road safely?
A: The crossing gourd.

Q: What treat do eye doctors give out on Halloween?
A: Candy corneas.

Q: What type of plants do well on all Hallow’s Eve?
A: Bam-BOO!

Q: Why don’t skeletons ever go trick or treating?
A: Because they have no-body to go with.