Curriculum Vitae

[uk666]

Curriculum Vitae

1. My first job was working in an orange juice factory, but I got canned ... couldn't concentrate.
2. Then I worked in the woods as a lumberjack, but I just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the ax.
3. After that I tried to be a tailor, but I just wasn't suited for it ... mainly because it was a so-so job.
4. Next I tried working in a muffler factory but that was too exhausting.
5. Then I tried to be a chef -- figured it would add a little spice too my life but I just didn't have the thyme.
6. I attempted to be a deli worker, but any way I sliced it, I couldn't cut the mustard.
7. My best job was being a musician, but eventually I found I wasn't noteworthy.
8. I studied a long time to become a doctor, but I didn't have any patience.
9. Next was a job in a shoe factory; I tried but I just didn't fit in.
10. I became a professional fisherman, but discovered that I couldn't live on my net income.
11. Thought about becoming a witch, so I tried that for a spell.
12. I managed to get a good job working for a pool maintenance company, but the work was just too draining.
13. I got a job at a zoo feeding giraffes but I was fired because I wasn't up to it.
14. So, then I got a job in a gymnasium (work-out-centre), but they said I wasn't fit for the job.
15. Next, I found being an electrician interesting, but the work was shocking.
16. After many years of trying to find steady work I finally got a job as a historian until I realized there was no future in it.
17. My last job was working at Starbucks, but I had to quit because it was always the same old grind.

SO, I RETIRED AND I FOUND I AM PERFECT FOR THE JOB!